Crushes are somehow a major part of our lives. They makes us realize how beautiful love is and how ugly we are to achieve that. Now if we categorize crushes, the one you have in your workplace will always be on top. The best & shittiest part of the workplace crush is that it is never on someone of your same age. Either you have it on your senior employee like a manager or it is on a new joining that vastly include interns. And, just like anyone else, I kinda fell in the same situation too. After joining the office I started to get attention by many girls and honestly, some of them were insanely hot. In a short period of just 6 months I dated many girls and undoubtedly, that was the kind of life I always wanted. Girls liked me and guys hated me for that, can it get any better? Frankly speaking, No! But can it get worse? Fuck Yeah!
The kind of attention I was getting never gave me time to admire someone and even I didn’t wanted to. But as someone great said ‘Shit Happens’ and eventually, it did. I got shifted next my senior who was 7 years older than me and that was the first time I got a close look at her and man was pretty. She was the kind of girl who would make your jaw drop and no matter how religious you are, you would say ‘Holy Shit’ for sure. A beautiful girl that talks sense and has a great sense of humor can easily turn your life upside down and make you add Taylor Swift’s songs into your playlist while being completely unknown. Unfortunately, I was in that situation and repeatedly tuning to Grenade by Bruno Mars. The journey from being Stifler to Urkel intensely sucked. From Joey Tribbiani I became Chandler Bing and just like Chandler, I was hopeless and awkward and desperate for love. And the fact that killed me the most was that she was engaged as well, unwillingly though, which kinda raised my hopes but still she was fucking engaged. The situation got worse as from ‘Grenade’ I started to listen to ‘Boulevard of Broken Dreams’ and this is the final stage of being heartbroken. Rather than feeling loveless I felt alone. The only thing that revived me from sadness was her smile. I guess making her smile somehow became a part of my work, it was like I couldn’t leave my office without doing that and yeah, I was working from home as well (IYKWIM).
But, this time the feeling was different. Unlike other crushes I neither wanted her sexually nor I wanted to be the only guy she loves. More than that, her smile mattered to me the most. All I wanted was her happiness, even if it is from any other guy. Now the question is that how screwed am I? And the answer is, not at all. The way I see it is that one-sided love doesn’t always mean that you fell in love with the wrong person. Love isn’t always meant to be achieved. Sometimes you fall in love for the right reasons and with the person who deserves it more than you do. She needed someone to make her laugh, speak out personal shit and make her feel good about herself, so I was there. It was the love that made me so caring and protective for her. And she was there just to me make me realize what actual love is, which I didn’t know and neither I wanted to. Now, if I ask myself how it all happened, the answer is pretty complicated yet simple. She was everything I never realized I always wanted!
